Saturday, January 19, 2008, 08:32 PM EST [General]
Good day all,
My grades are in and I have only 9 failures out of 130 for the semester... not too bad. Now quarter failures are huge, 35! Of course, 5 are non-native speakers I would normally pass but I gave them a 59 instead of a 60 to make a point. Administration pulled funding for my English Language Learner (ELL) aide and hasn't hired a suitable substitute for the ELL that is expected to be out for the next 3 to 6 months. These kiddos have been hung out to dry and I am NOT going to pretend everything is fine. They still passed the semester, but they NEED the support that they are being denied! Most of the others are just lazy. They had the opportunity to fix it and decided they didn't want to do the work. Better to learn how to recover from failure BEFORE they get to high school.
Been chatting with a new friend about my x and the divorce. Result was one of "those" dreams. Woke up panicked and barely able to breath... and 30 seconds later I was myself! I've come a very long way... only took 5 years. I've learned a lot this past year... made more progress than I have in... humph, can't remember it's been so long! Hey, I'm on a roll now! I am inspired by the way the folks around me are meeting their own challenges... I'm not quite up to taking the risks some of you are taking, at least not yet. But I'll get there... I feel like I'm headed in the right direction after drifting for the past year or so. The original metaphor had me tethered to someone else's ship, toed along by their faith and their dreams. The divorce cut that line and set me adrift. I'm still being carried along by universe's winds and currents, but for the first time I don't feel like I have to "work" at knowing. I am content.
I'm at the tail end of this cold, junk is
dripping down the back of my throat and playing havoc with my vocal
chords. I was standing at my door talking with my middlings as they
were coming in for their midterm. One of the young men told me I
sounded like a frog. Then thought I might take umbrage and added "a
sexy frog". I could see the wild-eyed panic in his face as he thought
he'd really overstepped himself. I laughed so hard I sent myself into
a coughing spasm... couldn't breath! Poor boy thought I'd die for
sure. "Should I go get your inhaler?" "Maybe you should sit down."
Really broke the tension. Who could take a midterm too seriously after
that?!?
My mind and body have settled into the ebb and flow of a
teacher's life. But I just can't find my spiritual feet. I stand
before my altar and... nothing. My heart is full and engaged as I send
energy and support to all those I carry with me each day... I have odd
little reminders for sending energy and requesting support to those on
my heart, like every time I walk through a doorway. These mini-prayers
feel right, have power. But I just can't seem to move beyond these
instantaneous prayers to any kind of a sustained ritual. Lack of
focus, poor discipline, wrong intentions... I just wish I could figure
out what I'm doing wrong. Oh well, the universe will have its way...
I'll work it out eventually.
On the lighter side, I have a new
grandma to report. The woman my son DIDN"T marry, because she wanted
more children and he didn't want any, just had her first grandchild. A
little girl, 18 inches and 4 lb 11 oz. A little small, but doing
well. Doctor expects to send her home tomorrow. Pretty cool!
Saturday, January 12, 2008, 11:51 AM EST [General]
1. Do you like blue cheese? most definitely 2. Have you ever smoked heroin? NEVER!!! 3. Do you own a gun? yes and a permit to carry 4. What flavor do you add to your drink at sonic? lemon or lime 5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? not unusually 6. What do you think of hot dogs? love 'em! with mustard, onions, relish and kraut 7. Favorite Christmas song? Away in the Manger, third verse in particular... though I now substitute "sweet goddess" 8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? usually green tea 9. Can you do push ups? yes, even at 200 pounds 10. What do you order at Starbucks? iced coffee with room for extra milk 11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? my figa 12. Favorite hobby? jewelry making 13. How do you eat your eggs? sunny side up 14. Do you have A.D.D.? nope, I'm just a ditz 15. What's one trait that you hate about yourself? like so many others procrastination 16. Middle name? which one? I have three 17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment. I need to clean this room, I should really start writing that midterm, wonder what the children are up to today 18. Name 3 things you bought yesterday. not a single thing 19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink.? water, green tea & diet Pepsi 20. Current worry right now.? how many of my middlings are going to fail the semester 21. Current hate right now? the fact that I am ALWAYS hungry 22. Favorite place to be? where ever my children are and I don't get there near enough 23. What did you do to bring in the New Year? slept... alone. I was sick, remember! 24. Where would you like to go? back to Oregon 25. Name three people who will complete this? haven't a clue 26. Do you own slippers? no, but I do have a pair of flip-flops 27. What shirt are you wearing? just a large towel, honest! I'm waiting for the conditioner in my hair to finish 28. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? nope, no traction 29. Can you whistle? out of tune 30. Favorite color?(s) to live with green, to wear red 31. Would you be a pirate? nope, I have no use for booty 32. What songs do you sing in the shower? lately a lullaby, Sleep my child and peace attend thee... 33. Favorite girl's name? Joy 34. Favorite boy's name? Thayer 35. What's in your pocket right now? I'm wearin' a towel, geesh! 36. Last thing that made you laugh? this quiz 37. Best bed sheets as a child? I'm with Heather, anything fresh off the clothes line 38. Worst injury you've ever had? broken heart or broken spirit... not sure which was worse 39. Do you love where you live? I am content 40. How many TVs do you have in your house? only 1... in the main room 41. Who is your loudest friend? don't have a friend I would describe as loud 42. How many dogs do you have? none, lease doesn't allow pets... and I'm seldom home anyway 43. Does someone have a crush on you? stars I hope not! 45. What is your favorite book? whatever I'm reading at the time, so last Harry Potter book 46. What is your favorite candy? dark chocolate 47. Favorite Sports Team? I'm a duck, any UO team, though I a partial to women's softball 48. What song do you want played at your Funeral? don't expect to have a funeral 49. What were you doing 12 AM last night? sleeping, not coughing! 50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up this morning? oh my sides ache... no coughing
Thank you for all your positive energies and good wishes. I am mending... slowly, but mending none the less.
Pathetic as it may seem, my middlings are complaining about the heat! Temperatures have reached the mid80s and my classroom is an oven. I'm on the ground floor of a 2 story tornado shelter and it just absorbs the heat... it was hotter inside the classroom than in the outdoors. Makes middlings very cranky and old teachers that remember classrooms before air conditioning laugh... not all that helpful. Such is life.
My sinuses are still dripping causing a cough and sore throat. I'm croaking like a frog! I have access to a voice enhancement system (microphone that ties into the classroom sound system), but I don't like it. We're preparing for midterms next week, so I'm able to lots of it with other technologies... but I still have to talk. It is a challenge, but one I relish. I'm glad to be back in the classroom. What can I say, I missed my middlings!
Must be off. I've still not graded all the tests from before the holiday. Grades are due the end of next week and my babies need time to fix some of their grades. I had planned to get them copies of their grades on Monday, but I didn't trust myself to grade when I am so sick and doped up. Now we are all behind the power curve. Again, such is life.
I'm back in my own space... and really quite glad to be home. Still struggling with this waste of time cold. Fever spiked again yesterday, probably due to the stress of traveling, but feel better today than I have in 2 weeks... YEAH!!!
Holiday presents were a hit. Son loves his new lamby soft blankee, his momma knows he's still very much the cuddly little boy of old. Joy loves her robe, as does Pickle Puppy. And the necklace I got for Jen was a success, well worth every penny I spent. Did the Build-a-Bear thing with Lilia, though was a real challenge. I didn't want to touch anything and kept my distance from the child, this creeping crud is not something I want to share with ANYONE! Picked up a new pair of Earth shoes for me, something I can't get here and I do not like purchasing shoes over the net.
I've been reading all of your New Year's Resolution blogs... and I stand amazed. I gave up on them years ago. But I have been inspired! I can manage blocks of 2 weeks though. So here goes:
1. Finish ESOL class THIS week.
2. Follow low carb eating plan.
3. Walk 1/2 hour daily.
4. Cleanse & charge crystals.
5. Balance check book. (I haven't done this in 9 months, so this could take a while!)
6. Find mammogram records and schedule. (about a year and a half overdue and the medico is becoming exercised)
That is about all I will honestly be able to handle. I've already made the weekly grocery run... including fixin's for homemade chicken soup. nothing like some Jewish penicillin to make a gal feel better.
I'm looking forward to going back to school, even though I am totally unprepared! To make matters even more challenging, the custodial staff waxed the floors (much needed and appreciated) but that means I had to disconnect all my technology before I left... will probably take a good half hour to get everything reconnected. Desks, stools, anything and everything movable is going to have to be hunted down and returned to its home. Oh and I have to wash the annoying and foul language from the desks. Didn't grade tests so I will have cranky students and I don't have formal lesson plan set up yet... but after the l-o-n-g holiday we'll spend most of the time reviewing procedures and setting expectations for the midterm. Flyin' by the seat of my pants yet again. Will I ever learn!?!
be well dear friends I have a GREAT feeling about this coming week... good things comin' @ ya!
